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CNY 2010
Tuesday, February 16, 2010 5:10 PM
So, it's already Chinese New Year 2010. It's funny how I have to take a deep breath before entering the house of one side of the family, yet happily skip my way into the other side's. Probably because we've never been close enough to that side, but I don't think we should push the blame to distance alone.
Because I'm always bombarded with questions like, "When are your results coming out?", "Have you applied to university yet?", "Are you working?" from one particular side of the family. I have no idea how to address some people, have no idea how many uncles I really have, have no idea what to say. And let me say that I absolutely hate shaking hands and saying "Happy New Year", because I think the act of shaking hands is the most obvious way of saying, "We don't really know each other". To shake hands, you must literally keep the other person an arm's length away from yourself. How much more distance can you keep from the other? It's a terrible way of wishing someone. But I have to shake hands with these people, because they extend theirs to mine.
Fast forward to the other side of the family, and we're joking and smiling, and my heart almost feels some sort of tangible warmth when we gather to take a family photo. And we never shake hands. We sling our arms over each other's shoulders, hug, hook our arms in each other's. And why not? Isn't that what family means? Being totally at ease with each other, never worried about whether they will judge you based on your academic results, your job, your successes and your failures.
My sister scribbles the names of the people who give her angbaos behind the red packets. We don't know the name of the aunt on one side of the family, so she just writes "Hot air balloon", because that particular aunt just told us how she sat on a hot air balloon last holiday. On the other hand, she immediately writes "美女" on my grand-aunt's angbao on the other side of the family, because that's how we address her every time we see her, even though she's probably around 50 years older than us.
That's the disparity I'm forced to face every single year, and the sad, most unfortunate reason why I cherish one side of the family more than the other.
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