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I Wish
Tuesday, June 01, 2010 8:32 PM
I remember one day in primary school where the principal made an announcement.
"XXX has lost her father. Please donate money to help her."
And then that schoolmate went around with a bag to every classroom for us to chip some cash in to help. And I remember being very puzzled. I thought, "If she's lost her father, then she should go back to the place where she lost him and bring him back." I still recall, very vividly, how my imagination brought me to this fuzzy scene of a funfair, where my parents often said is the easiest place for children to get lost, and that schoolmate's father standing in front of the ferris wheel, wondering when his family would come back to get him. I thought he couldn't find his own way back home.
I just thought of "lost" as literal, and not the way it meant to be interpreted. Those were the days where perception was not clouded, where euphemisms went unnoticed and where ignorance meant innocence.
I still remember that schoolmate's name, and the look on her face as she passed that bag around. And now that I finally understand the true meaning of the announcement, I realize how painful that look was. I wish I'd known. I wish I'd said, "I'm sorry".
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